Monday, December 12, 2005

Don't call me buddy, pal.

For the second time in two weeks a certain client has referred to me as ‘buddy’. Both times, I’d just put forth an argument which had crushed his. Both times my tone walked the tightrope between diplomatic and patronising (erring towards the former was a particular challenge). And, both times the client ended the conversation with ‘thanks buddy’. I hate being called ‘buddy’, and hate even more being called it by someone younger than me. I find it a derogatory term, and I can only presume that is why he used it when thanking me. He obviously wasn’t going to say “thank you for proving my argument was not well-thought out, and for also doing this in a public forum with my superiors.”

I mentioned this to a few of my colleagues, and the general response was they felt ‘buddy’ wasn’t necessarily negative. I beg to differ:

- 10 year old boy helps dad in the garden, does a poor job of it, but Dad nonetheless says ‘thanks buddy’. It was said in good spirit, but was dismissive of his efforts – and of course, the boy is blissfully unaware of this.

- 13 year old boy grabs a few beers from the fridge for Dad and his mates. “Thanks buddy”. Boy has a sip of his Dad’s. He has another, then Dad says “That’s enough for you buddy”.

- Apprentice mechanic hands the tradesman a shifter. “Thanks buddy”. Maybe next time he’ll get to have a go himself, but he’s not quite ready yet.

To set a context for where this term is used, I guess it always involves the following:

1. You’re referred to as ‘buddy’ by someone older than you.

2. You’re in a situation where you’re not quite old/competent enough yet.

3. You’ve done something to help, with good intentions.

So I guess what grated on me most was the client is younger and that I am more competent than he. At least I did help him, even if it involved bruising his ego. So, don't fucking call ME buddy, pal.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Mistaken Identity

Day 4 (yesterday) and it’s the sister Agency’s Christmas party. During the day, a couple of people at my Agency were discussing a colleague; let’s call him Ben, who works across both Agencies. I had both yet to meet Ben, and learn that several people within that Agency share his name.

At the party (and after several cocktails) I was introduced to Ben.

ME (pleasant): Nice to meet you finally Ben, so, you head up the Digital division don’t you?

BEN (laughing, and dismissive): Ha ha, yeah, I don’t know anything about fucking websites.

ME (thinking he is who I think, and playing along): So what do you do then Ben?

BEN (still laughing, and being cheeky): I launched this Agency in the Australasian market!

ME (not going to be taken for a ride): Bullshit!

The conversation then was quickly changed by a colleague. Turns out Ben did indeed launch the Agency. To call it a faux pas would be an understatement…

Thursday, December 01, 2005

One Word Equity

OK, so we all know brief templates are almost identical from Agency to Agency - they just use different terms that reflect the Agencies’ ‘approach’ (e.g. Disruption, Brand Essence etc.) At my new Agency, we have a “One Word Equity” (OWE).

One of the simian’s I met earlier in the week at a briefing decided to change the Agency’s OWE provided in our return brief. The OWE changed from an actual equity of importance to consumers, to, wait for it, “Brand Awareness”. Now, the fact this is indeed two words isn’t what strikes me as being particularly stupid (I just assume reading comprehension wasn’t his strong suit at school), what shocked me was trying to understand how his brain had misfired to conclude Brand Awareness was an equity in this instance.

This particular job is about a company becoming more accessible to consumers, in the physical sense. Therefore, the OWE could be ‘Accessibility’, or even ‘Convenience’. Certainly not ‘Brand Awareness’.

What’s more, the simian chose to enlighten us to his genius via email (I fucking hate that), and when responded to both electronically and by leaving several phone messages – we discovered the simian had become lost in the jungle and just couldn’t be contacted.

I warned our footpath fruit seller to keep a close eye on his bananas. In the meantime, we'll keep a traquilizer gun close to hand, and work from OUR brief.

Wrightoff.
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