Head like a hole

No, this isn't a NIN flashback. It's a post about classic ad quotes. Not quotes I've read, but quotes I've experienced. Occasions when a point raised in a meeting made everyone shut the fuck up and listen. The sentence which stoped even the quickest thinker in his/her soiled tracks. Those few words that weren't meant to be read being between the lines. The words that 'just had to be spoken'.

It all started with one of those briefs where the client decided to shift the goal posts. Not just once, but several times. And not just in relation to what we should say, but who we should say it to. It ended up with the client insisting on a message being tailored to several segments that were about as similar as beef and rhubarb...

ART DIRECTOR:

"So let me get this straight, you don't want to target young, idealistic females anymore, but, really, you want to speak to any cunt with a mouth?"

CLIENT:

"I'm sorry?"

ART DIRECTOR:

"You want to speak to any cunt with a mouth. That's what you're telling us, isn't it? Please, correct me if I'm wrong here".

CLIENT:

"Well yes, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying you're concepts don't meet the brief because you've polarised our audience."

ART DIRECTOR:

"Oh. Right. You mean we spoke to cunts with a cleft palette. Not every cunt with a hole in their head?"